Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Yesterday...crazy thoughts..

Yesterday was a day I am glad I do not need to redo today. Did that make sense? If not..blame it on the pain meds.

My friend Grace took me for my biopsy and snapped this picture while waiting to go back. Do I need to even say how nervous I was. Needles going into these two hard as a rock masses...yuck. I had it built up in my mind...and um...it lived up to all my worry.

So as I sit there all worried. The nurse comes out and is looking at the file. I get all worried and Grace says..oh it is not you...your name is easy to say..she is trying to figure out how to say the name..

Oh okay good...reminder I am on pain meds...so I believe this ...then she says....

Come on..what did she say?

Amy...I look at Grace and say a curse word...bad I know..but I did . I get up and walk slowly to the scale. Yuck..hate the scale.

I went back and sat for what seemed forever. The nurse looks at me and says..Umm..are you alright?

Well Miss Nurse...you are talking back and forth about blade sizes and what type of tunes and whatnots you will need. Umm...Sure I feel great.

Then I hear the Dr whisper outside the door...does she know about the reports?

I just wanna ask a question...why is it when you want to hear what they are saying you can not. And when you do not want to hear things..you can.

For what seemed like forever yesterday I spent my time straining to hear every word of what they were saying and then covering my ears for the other.

When I left..I was shaken and scared and worried...but not broken..


Charmaine said...

{hugs} I think the fear of the unknown is the worst fear, especially for those of us with really good imaginations. I can only imagine how you must of felt, waiting for the procedure to be done and the overwhelming worry. I will continue to hold you up to the Lord, and I have to believe he is going to give us a miracle.

JANE said...

One step at a time girl, one step at a time! Hugs!!

Lisa said...

Hi Amy -

Even though I haven't been on here...doesn't mean that I haven't thought about you. Hoping the test results come back ok. Thinking of you, praying and sending you hugs!!

Love Ya ~ Lisa

He And Me + 3 said...

I am praying and thinking of you so much everyday. My heart is anxious for you...but He is in control.

Huse Yo Mama said...

You're a trooper!!!! I've been MIA, so I have a lot of catching up to do!

Shannon said...

Praying for you! Thanks for always keeping us in the loop.

I loved seeing those palm trees in the picture. Not that I miss FL a lot but having grown up in South FL it does bring back memories since there are none up here.