Monday, March 23, 2009

A FULL VENT

A little rough afternoon here today...I need someone to take me away and come and fix this for me. FIX IT ALL. But since that is not going to happen I am coming here to vent whine and beg someone to tell me it is all going to be okay. Okay yes I know it will be...I just needed to hear it....

Today Philip slept till 2:45 pm. He is not feeling well and his mood is showing it. Which means I am paying a price. A HIGH price. I know and I get it...I understand he is not feeling well and I get it that he is stressed out...but I also have a limit. I have feelings ....and I am a tad over being the venting post ...there I said it.

Today Philip just went overboard....and I felt defeated. I seem to feel more defeated lately then not. It is not as easy as it was when he was little. He is not little. He is a young man and he is driving me nuts ....yes I understand and I know it is justified...but it can hurt...

Today I am worn down...back and forth...He is going to have the first stage of surgery ...now he is not..then he is not..okay he is..someone please just tell me when he decides and is dressed for us to go..Cause I may have a nervous breakdown.

Okay yes that was a FULL venting.

13 comments:

Aspiemom said...

You can vent to us anytime.

What's harder than being a parent to a hormonal and emotional kid? A Sick one! I'm sorry that he's affecting you with his moods.

Mari said...

I think you are entitled to a vent- it's been a rough few weeks. I can't do anything physically for you but I can pray and will do so as soon as I finish this comment.

ixtapacheryl said...

Oh Amy - my heart goes out to you. Like I said not only do you have to deal with your illness - but you are a caretaker as well. I know how hard it is when your loved one is feeling pain and takes it out on you. Believe me - I know EXACTLY how you are feeling (from a caretaker's role).

There are days I just want to run away. I'm so tired of the "no talking". I ache for companionship - what I had before. It's not there anymore.

Gosh now you have me venting. Oh to make you feel a little better .... my tire ripped apart today taking my mother back to her assisted living facility. I'm trying to call Jeff and of course he doesn't have his hearing aid in. So guess what - I (as usual) have to take care of the crisis myself.

Get home one hour late and here he is laying on top of the bed - not showered, shaved, dressed, etc. I told him what happened and he just said "oh". BUT he did have enough sense about him to ask for a pain pill.

So there ---- I just wanted to make you smile.

Get a good night's sleep. If you have ear plugs - put them in. Hey what about a bowl of popcorn and a nice DIET soda.... Don't forget the "legal" butter you can slather on the top.

Lots of hugs

April said...

Bring it on, Amy...I'm all ears! I'm sure you and Philip are both feeling very stressed right now. It's a tough time for everyone. Praying for calmer nerves...

Grace said...

This is your home to vent. Wish I could do something to help. A very dear friend suggested a recipe for me today... not saying that it will change anything... but it might help relax... lock the bathroom door and take a well deserved bath.

And on my end I'll be praying... oh and I'll let you know when he's dressed and waiting by the van to go for his surgery... okay? Hugs...

farmorethandiamonds said...

amy... I love you.... your "venting" and your ups and downs are so REAL...

I wanted to let you know I'm passing along a blog award to you.. it's at my money saving blog if you want it. :)

~Deni

Mommy of the Dynamic Duo said...

Here with hugs, patience, and always an ear to vent to.

Hope said...

Bless your heart, you need a break! I'm sure he's scared and so are you. He's a young man trying to be tough and it has to be hard on both of you. ((Hugs))
It will get better!

bluesuede said...

Hey, let it all out! We can take it.

And, after that bath that Grace suggested, don't forget the Pink. That should calm your nerves. Maybe, Philip needs a little spritz.

Michele Williams said...

You can vent anytime... We can pray for you and your family... Bless you dear friend...

Charmaine said...

My heart and prayers goes out to both of you. I can not imagine the feelings going on in Phillips young mind and heart...the conflicts that he must feel. Then there is you, his momma, feeling the same things, but from a different perspective of a mother and with a much longer lifetime of life experiences to put with it...plus you are dealing with your own issues...I think you need to vent, if you try to hold it all in you are going to explode! Sending prayers for both of you, may the week progress positively for all of you, may you feel peace and calmness and find comfort knowing that we all are sending our prayers and good thoughts.

bluesuede said...

I hope that everything calmed down by last night. I know that you and your family have been through more than any of us can imagine. I'm sure that Philip senses your emotions. He probably wants to take some of the burden off of you, but with all the medications, coming off of them, the upcoming surgery, and his age, he is probably on a roller coaster of emotions. You know that if he felt good, he really wouldn't want to make things worse, he would want to make them better.

I pray from some peace and tranquility in your family today and during the coming weeks.

misty said...

My heart goes out to you..you have so much you are dealing with. It is good to get your feelings out...I wish there was more we could do more to help.But what we can do is pray,listen and hold on to hope.Hugs to you!