Thursday, April 9, 2009

Ask and Answer...Part Two

If you have not read Part One . Please take a minute to go back and read I answered a few good questions on that blog post.

Lori's question was :My question to you is how do you do it???? You seem so together and strong. I think I would just break and not want to go on! I admire you for that!Lori

Oh Lori...I sure have you fooled. Ha. I feel like a whinny mess. Thank you for the great question and the sweet comment. To answer your question "how do I do it". Well I use to get asked that a lot with Philip's brain surgeries and stroke. And one day I just figured out that I really did not have a choice. I think in the tough times or crisis you just go in over drive mode. That is what I have been doing. Some days I feel like a complete failure and like I am falling apart. But in the end I hope that I show that I am just a mom and a wife who is trying the very best she can. I do not always do it perfect or pretty. But I am NOT giving up. Thank you for your great support Lori.

Amy asked: How does your husband Jim deal with the stress of having a sick son and a sick wife? DO the extra responsibilities weigh on him?
Great question Amy. One thing about me in my blog is I am blunt. I sort of just say it like it is. So the truth is...we are struggling some. We are going through a lot of stages ..and it is starting to take a toll on our relationship. I have always been the one that has taken the "blunt" of Philip's medical issues. Not that it was planned that just worked out that way. I had to stop working and stay with him after his brain brain operation and strokes. So I was the hands on parent while Jim worked. Jim is use to me being strong and pushing through things no matter what. I just can not push through lately. He understands I am sick. And he is worried. But I think when he sees me struggle it reminds him that I am not well. One thing he mentions often bothers him to see me sleep so much on the weekends. He says it just shows him how tired I get. He knows in 21 years of marriage I am not a nap gal.
You know ..something happen last week that reminded me that while we think we "know" our spouses and how they feel..we can still get surprised. Jim was reading my blog about Philip when he was a baby. He got very emotional and said he had almost forgotten those days. I think like myself ..we are just finding our by day.
The stress of Jim's job is non stop. It is no secret that he is in jeopardy of losing his job any day now...after working for the same company for 18 year. Everyday he comes home worried and leaves for work worried. I so wish I could do something to help him feel better.

I hope you will contuine to ask questions. Not only are they fun to answer..they have made me really stop and think.


bluesuede said...

I know how it is to have the stress of your husband losing his job. We went through that and it was miserable, and we didn't have 4 children with one of them sick. Maybe, Jim can start looking for a job and get ahead of the curve. My husband knew his company was on its way out, so he got a job before they closed the plant.

Shannon said...

You sure do have us fooled. Because I would easily peg you as one of the strongest persons I know. I admire you so much.
I hate the added stress of Jim's job situation. Like life isn't stressful enough for you. You are in my prayers so often.

Charmaine said...

All I can say is your are simply amazing!