Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Just some Thoughts...Follow up...

I wanted to address a few things...
First of all I have NEVER been anything but blunt honest and down to earth in my blog. Knowing myself like I think I do...That will not change...even if I wanted it to...and well...I do not.

First let me thank all of you for your wonderful response to my earlier post
As always the "just getting it out" was more helpful then I had thought it would be. Maybe I just needed to say it out loud and have it heard. And then your sweet comments of support was so helpful. What a wonderful group of ladies I have who support me and my family. Thank You all so much.

I wanted to address the comment about getting professional help. I know that I do not need to share this but I want to. It is something I am proud of because it was not easy and yet so good for me.

I spent a year seeing a wonderful man name George who helped me become the person I am today. He was gentle and caring while forcing me to take responsibility for my life. What a year that was. I do not even remember the person I was before George. A added bonus that I did not know about George until a few months into our appts...he spent years in school to become a minister and changed his career. So I got a added bonus of knowledge from George during our appts.

The truth is....no amount of professional treatments is going to erase my hurt or disappointment I have for my son and the pain he has to deal with on a daily basis. Now dealing with those emotions is something I have learned to deal with. But in truth I think I could sit in a DR office everyday and that will not give me the answers I need. So who can give me those answers? God. And so far he has not answered that for me. Could it be I have not asked in the right way? Often enough? Or maybe I have not listened to the answers. I will work on that...at home..in Private and maybe sometimes in my blog...and IF I need George...I will be the first one to dial his number.

One more thing I wanted to address is the private emails ....I know we each have our own reasons for reading certain blogs. I am sorry you had to stop following my blog because it was a "downer" . But what I am even more sorry about is the fact you had to email me and tell me how you felt. I am NOT here to entertain anyone...Being a mom to 4 children and a wife...I do enough "trying to please" I just can not do it daily in my blog. Sorry...It is best you just not follow...Good decision.

Soooo...with all that being said...

How the heck is everyone night going? Are you all keeping warm?

32 comments:

Tink said...

What?!! Someone E-MAILED you and said that? Wow! I'm not sure where you live, but we're having a bloggy lunch and we'd love to have anyone and everyone there! Visit my blog to find out particulars. Hope to see you there.

Christy said...

Amy I don't comment a lot, and I apologize to a degree (because I don't think you blog for comments, but to share and get it out..but the apology is so you know you have more praying for you).

I think it's so easy for others to tell someone another needs professional help, when they just simply don't have a clue what that person is truly going through because they've never been there.

You're completely right...you need GOD and he has you, loves you, and carries your burdens. I continue to pray for you.

annie kelleher said...

i think that when we get dealt sucky cards we have every right to complain - at least once in a while. and this is your little piece of cyberspace - you can say anything you want!!! its funny, but i started my blog as a way of dealing with the reality of caring for my grandmother - she was old and cranky and mean when she was young, and got worse the older she became. it really helped to have a place to vent... i was so much more patient with her because of it, im sure! and thanks for asking... im planning my basket of 13 Essential Things and i've already have at least five things, plus a REALLY cute basket all together all ready!!!!

Vickie said...

Amy..
As I was reading your blog today (both times) my mind kept going to the following passage of scripture. I like the way it come across in the "amplified" version even though it makes it kind of wordy.
I just kept thinking in answer to your question/wondering, "what am I to do?"...I believe the answer is that you do what you've been doing. You cling to HIS grace and let His strength be your strength...and you do your best to trust Him and be grateful to Him in the midst of your circumstances...exactly as you have been doing. So here is the passage that my mind has returned to repeatedly as I have thought about you and prayed for you and for Philip...


2 Corinthians 12:8-10
Three times I called upon the Lord and besought [Him] about this and begged that it might depart from me;
But He said to me, My grace (My favor and loving-kindness and mercy) is enough for you [sufficient against any danger and enables you to bear the trouble manfully]; for My strength and power are made perfect (fulfilled and completed) and show themselves most effective in [your] weakness. Therefore, I will all the more gladly glory in my weaknesses and infirmities, that the strength and power of Christ (the Messiah) may rest (yes, may pitch a tent over and dwell) upon me!
So for the sake of Christ, I am well pleased and take pleasure in infirmities, insults, hardships, persecutions, perplexities and distresses; for when I am weak [in human strength], then am I [truly] strong (able, powerful in divine strength).

April said...

Oh, Amy...I wish I could give you a big hug! My heart really does ache for you. Pay no attention to those out there who don't understand. I think I've said it before, but I'll never pretend I know what it's like to walk a day in your shoes. That would only be doing a disservice to you and I won't do that! I do, however, understand pain, hurt, and disappointment.

Just know that I'm thinking of you and praying for you all the same!

He And Me + 3 said...

No, I am not keeping warm, but thanks for asking. You are so great! Thanks for always sharing your heart and your thoughts.

ixtapacheryl said...

Dear Amy: I just want you to know that everyday I log onto the computer - your blog is the first site I bring up. I look forward to reading your blog and believe it or not - you are also helping me with my complex feelings about my husband's illness. Your thoughts help me understand my husbands emotions and actions. For that I can't thank you enough.

Keep on blogging Amy!!! My prayers and thoughts are with you, Philip and your family daily.

melissa batterberry said...

Are you flippin serious? People emailed you to tell you you were a downer? Why is it bad things happen to good people? UNBELIEVABLE!!!
PS~it's 24*, spring fever has hit!! Isn't that crazy?! Take care. Mis

Deni said...

Wow, girl, that's hard, I mean, that people would email you and say that kind of stuff...this is your blog, YOUR journal and you are allowed to share what you want. I myself have had some issues just in the past few days with people giving me grief (for different reasons) and I am working on making myself and my blog more real and transparent and I am ready to tell people if they don't like it, then don't read it! It's called a personal blog/journal for a reason! I am so sorry this happened to you! Hang in there and be who you are, no one else! Don't let anyone tell you how to blog!

Denise said...

Oh Amy...Im so sorry that you had to deal with that person and their email. I dont understand how some people think.

and I am cold btw, lol

Melissa said...

My best advice? Be still and know I am there...it's truly what is getting me through every day...that and Zoloft ;)

Hang in there, we are all here to support you whether you post happy or sad things. Whether you struggle or things are easy. Whatever you need all you need to do is ask...

The Thompson's said...

Hey Amy, I have read your blog for a little while now. I have become a follower. I noticed that you follow my sons site, so I wanted to invite you to follow our family page as well. Its where the beef is.

Our Prayers are Always with You,

Tim

Amy B said...

Tim ...

I swear I am not a stalker...LOL
I found your son's page when I could not get your link to work..so I followed his to go back to find yours. Thanks for reminding me. And even more important...Thank You for the great support. I read your How we met story and LOVED it.

bluesuede said...

Well, I think a lot of us can relate to your feelings due to various types of other circumstances in our own lives. Let it out, girl. Nobody has to read it if they don't want to. As for me, I ain't going anywhere. You're stuck with me.

E said...

Wow - they emailed and said you were a downer?

Goodness! I'd think they'd be counting their blessings that maybe they weren't going through the same struggles but sympathizing with the fact that YOU are. Some people just aren't very sensitive!

Don't worry. You didn't need them anyway. =0)

Wibeche og Rune said...

This is my first time I visit your blog and I found your blog very interesting:)

God bless you

Wibeche

Amy Fichtner said...

Oh Amy, please don't let htose e-mails getto you. We ALL get negetive peole and comments on our blogs. I really don't know what else to say just that, dn't let it bother you and to keep being yourself. one reason I do read your blog is because you are so open and honest.

misty said...

Amy,girl...you being you is so great. Please don't let that stuff get to you. You have every right to have the feelings you have. I am so glad you share with us,please never change. You are an inspiration, and the way you deal with life, no matter what curveball it throws at you, it is teaching me to see the blessings through the obstacles. You are such a blessing. Take care my friend. Prayers as always for you, Philip and your family.

Cascia said...

Hang in there. I know how you feel. I will be praying for you. Everything will be just fine.

I just found your blog and love it! I'm looking forward to reading more.

Stacy said...

Thanks for always being honest and sharing with us. These blogs are own dairies and we put what we want to. If some one doesn't like the "real" stuff well maybe it is better that they not read it!

Sassy Cass said...

Girl, you are way too nice. This is your blog. It is your space to do, say and feel whatever. Your life is not a means to entertain all of us. Most of us come here because we care and want to pray, cry, whine, etc. right along with you. You are an inspritation to me. Hang in there, mama.

Aimee said...

WHAT THE???!?!?!? Well, thank GOD blogs are all different or this whole blogspot thing would be sooooo boring and I wouldn't be so addicted to other peoples lives...talk about needing to talk to someone...*wink*...hang in there all you have is a mother's heart, so what you think and feel is exactly as God designed you to think and feel...YOU ARE A MOTHER!!! nough' said!

Ann said...

Some people....enough said.

Keep writing, we will keep reading and commenting. Thanks for sharing!!!

It is cold here, but my husband and I are tucked in for the night. It is good to be home after traveling for so many months.

*I'm having a Valentine's give-a-way on my blog, come on over and check it out. :D

JANE said...

Hey I had a friend, his name was Ralph!! He was an Episcopal priest as well as counselor. It was always such a relief just to know he was there if I needed him!!

Andrea said...

Amy,
You go Girl! I love the fire in you! Never stop being Amy! This blog is such a great way for you to never have to shove things deep down again! I've learned to be an open book and have an open heart. Sometimes people try to bring me down and say mean things, but I'm glad I'm vulnerable because that makes me real. My students always open up to me and share things with me and I tell them that this is the best way to deal with their sadness and hard times. They need to scream and just let it out. Kee p sharing and releasing those feelings because it can only make you stronger. God will answer all those questions in his timing as hard as that may be for us to understand. I'm praying for you always. By the way, went camping in Santa Barbara this weekend, the weather was like summer. I'm warm in So.Ca. On the downside we had an earthquake today, ugh! Living through the 94 earthquake, I screamed "Earthquake." Turns out my students were the only ones in the whole school to jump under their desks. I was teased about that one! That is a side effect of ANXIETY!! Have a good day! Andrea

Anonymous said...

people have yet to learn that a blog is just our way of "purging" our deepest ,most personnel thoughts and feelings....but on the other hand i guess we do subject ourselves to the "un-friendless "of opinions! it is what make the world go round!have a great pain free day..you deserve it!
cb/marianne

Alison said...

Hi Amy
Just wanted to send you some love - I'm one of the seldom-commenting people (maybe you remember me from kimkins)... and I just wanted to let you know there's folks out there reading and keeping track and sending you love and prayers (even though we don't write in much).
You are remarkable and beautiful, articulate and open, really an incredible person. Thank you for sharing so much with so many of us. Alison P

*Keli* said...

Yep, it's your blog and you get to do what you please with it! How horribly insensitive for someone to email you that comment! I don't get it - just don't follow and do it silently...click you are gone! Why hurt someone's feelings! Ok, enough...Amy, you are a wonderfully, caring, beautiful woman and an awesome wife and mom! I continue to pray for you, Philip and your family for healing, strength and patience! Just keep praying, God answers in His time and I know it's hard to be patient! I love you, friend!! xo Kel

Linda said...

Dear Amy -

I have not posted before, but I just have to today. You are handling everything as well, and better than anyone I can imagine. I have had trials myself...and just let me say...you are awesome! It brings tears to my eyes to think anyone would hurt you in any way. This is real life, not a 2 hour movie. Life can be a struggle...but there is also joy, hope, comfort, love of family and friends, and those little things we all love in our daily routine. You are just handling things wonderfully...you are the kind of person I'd love as a friend and neighbor! Hang in there Amy! Sending you and your family prayers and love....

Linda

Lisa said...

As far as I am concerned, the person who stopped following you is missing out. You are an example, an inspiration, a wife a mother who can go on with life not feeling well. I thought of you this weekend because I had the flu, and just being sick for 2 days was such an effort having to deal with the family who is not happy if mom is not happy. God is with you Amy and if He is for you no one can be against you. You hang in there...I am praying for you and your thoughts and concerns are always important to me : )

michele said...

Your blog is honest and true. It is refreshing. I am currently reading the book of Job. I think that possibly during many "seasons" of my life I would be encouraged by Job, but right now when I read it I feel depressed. God asked Job to struggle with so, so much. I am sure you don't know why God is asking you to endure what you are. My prayer for you is that you will feel God's comfort and peace. Hang in there.

Rachel Ann said...

Thanks for stopping by on my SITS day last week...I feel so loved and overwhelmed with all the comments! Sorry it's taken me so long to respond back!